Clueless Clutter

Survey Says

Here is some clueless clutter for you in case you needed more evidence of how far we have to go when it comes to infertility and adoption education.

Lori at Lavender Luz.com writes about the adoption-themed commercial put out by Kay Jewelers. Lori writes,” How many adoption ad myths, much general cluelessness can be crammed into a 30-second commercial?”

How many adoption stereotypes ad myths, much general cluelessness can be crammed into one 30-second commercial?
Read more at http://lavenderluz.com/2014/02/kay-jewelers-failed-adoption-ad.html#owQTe0MkrWzjtb36.99
How many adoption stereotypes ad myths, much general cluelessness can be crammed into one 30-second commercial
Read more at http://lavenderluz.com/2014/02/kay-jewelers-failed-adoption-ad.html#owQTe0MkrWzjtb36.99
How many adoption stereotypes ad myths, much general cluelessness can be crammed into one 30-second commercial
Read more at http://lavenderluz.com/2014/02/kay-jewelers-failed-adoption-ad.html#owQTe0MkrWzjtb36.99
How many adoption stereotypes ad myths, much general cluelessness can be crammed into one 30-second commercial
Read more at http://lavenderluz.com/2014/02/kay-jewelers-failed-adoption-ad.html#owQTe0MkrWzjtb36.99
How many adoption stereotypes ad myths, much general cluelessness can be crammed into one 30-second commercial
Read more at http://lavenderluz.com/2014/02/kay-jewelers-failed-adoption-ad.html#owQTe0MkrWzjtb36.99

Read “Every Diss Begins with This Kay Commercial” and view the commercial and share your own thoughts and comments.

Let’s interview real people with these experiences to get an idea of who to market to and how to do it in the best way. Better yet, let’s not do it in the first place. Adoption is not something you can wrap up in a little box for a 30 second spot on TV.

The second post comes from Mel at Stirrup-Queens.

Mel writes that US News & World Report covered a study last week that found that women who don’t have a child after fertility treatments are three times more likely to divorce than women who do.  27% of the women overall were not living with their partner anymore, though a larger chunk of that 27% were women without children than women with children.

The researchers in Denmark reported that they were surprised by the findings and ” that the effect lasted so long.”

*note: The article is no longer found on US News & World Report’s website.

Click over to read Mel’s entire post, “Researchers are Stunned that Infertility is Stressful”

I should neither be stunned nor shocked that people are surprised that the affects and aftermath of infertility are so damaging. It goes along with the “just adopt” or “you can have my kids! (ha ha).” But it is still upsetting that infertility is so misunderstood. We need to keep writing, advocating and sharing our stories to help make some changes and bridge the gap of understanding between the physical and the emotional side effects of infertility.

*image provided by commons.wikimedia

Rage Against the Addiction

Image courtesy of Lionsgate

The death of Philip Seymour Hoffman hits close to home. He grew up in Rochester, NY living only 25 minutes from my home. He has family here and often returned to his alma mater, Fairport High School. I am sad not only because he was truly a talented man but because he perished so young. There are many news stories circulating about the circumstances of his death being caused by an over dose. Hoffman struggled with addiction for many years.

Yesterday I saw about a half a dozen different news outlet’s headlines popping up in my newsfeed. All were saying roughly the same thing- wonderful actor, too young, gentle and kind man. When I began reading the comments posted to the news posts, I was beyond upset and even disgusted at what some people wrote. When someone dies due to addiction, it does not diminish their death or their life, for that matter. I know it is hard for people to understand that even though one can “choose” to begin using a certain drug or “choose” to drink alcohol, what they do not “choose” is the pre-disposed, biological mind-set that puts so many individuals down this path. Addiction is a disease and an extremely sad one at that.

Imagine being so distraught, depressed and even physically ill and dependent on a substance, that it controls your entire life. Who would “choose” that?

I am deeply saddened for this man and his family. My heart goes out to them for having to put up with heartless individuals who will comment on the way he died- judging him. How hurtful that must be when already mourning the loss of your husband, father, son or friend.

The world lost a gifted man too soon. No matter how many times we see this happen in Hollywood, it does not become less sad or thought provoking. It is the gifted people, the inwardly focused and reflective artists who often suffer from mental illness and addiction. They feel very deeply and often struggle with depression; addiction is one way they cope with their mental illness or hard ship. This is another chance for our society to better understand addiction and mental illness- not berate this man for losing his own battle way too young.